When I say, “Need Job, Will Travel.” it’s not a kitschy reference to a Western of yesteryear. I need a job like there’s no tomorrow, and I will indeed travel.

I’m in my third week without a full time job. I’m working two part time jobs and several gigs but these bills are not getting paid. I’ll admit I desperately need this $30 check that was mailed 3 weeks ago that still hasn’t shown up.
I’ve applied, I’ve interviewed and I’ve sent emails, made posts and calls but the well appears to be dry. In more places than one.

My friends and family have been as helpful as they can be, but I can’t ask them for anything more.

Sure, I can blame the economy. The job market has become so desolate I am cold emailing strangers on Nextdoor soliciting them for help.
I could blame the state I live in for being one of the leaders in poverty and poor health.
I can blame myself too. I am not on Craigslist drooling for another one night stand. I’m not sending 100 copies of my resume a day looking for my next part-time gig, I’m not selling my instruments, laptops, phones, I must not want it bad enough. I must not be working hard enough.

I’ve considered prostitution. A few short hours with a wealthy lonely man could solve six months of financial turmoil, but I wouldn’t be able to live with myself.

Finishing a college degree was the impetus for moving to the city I live in.
I’ve been keeping a countdown of how many days until I finish school:
34 days
6 of those are actual class days.
At the end of these 34 days-I will be unchained to the stone of academia and free to well, live my life. Simultaneously, at the end of these 34 days I’m also looking at a heavy possibility of losing my house and car.
But I’ll have a degree.

I believe to lose something is a clearing of the path for what’s to come. I am not upset, for the purpose of renting a house was to get through school.
The mission has been accomplished, what more would I need it for?
Within day to day life, it’s easy to forget all arrivals must depart.

With that in mind, it’s hard to find the motivation to take a placeholder job for 34 days. It doesn’t help my situation at large, and it creates more chaos and problems. Because I am still in school for another month, I’m not fully able to work full time because no employer I know enjoys the awkward availability conversation. “Oh sure I can start work tomorrow, but on Tuesdays and Thursdays I can’t work from 9am-2pm, can we work around that?”

Mentally, physically, spiritually I am off-center. I have no routine. Every day is different than the day before, and I don’t sleep much. I’m taking cash advances, and if I didn’t have money in my student account I don’t know what I’d be doing for food right now.

I’m more than willing to work, why can’t I find a job?